Key Takeaway
There are no wrong feelings, but there are harmful actions. You can learn to cope with hard feelings in a healthy way.
Wellbeing
Crying can make you feel better because it lets the feelings out instead of keeping them bottled up inside. But don't worry: if you don't feel like crying, that's okay too.
Not every strategy will work for you but try some out!
If your emotions feel like too much to handle, talk to a professional like a therapist or a school counselor. They can give you a safe place to share how you're feeling and give you advice and strategies to help you cope. Visit Getting Help to find supports in your area.
Give yourself time to process and come to terms with the news. Healing doesn't happen overnight, so be patient and kind with yourself! Take a look at our Coping statements to remind yourself how strong you are.
Try to stick to your regular daily routine as much as possible. This helps to keep your days organized, and gives you a sense of stability, even when things feel uncertain. Use our Routine Planner/Scheduler to help you plan your days.
Your parents might not always know how you're feeling. If you feel comfortable, talking to them about your feelings and worries can be a good idea. You can also find out more about where they're coming from, which might help you understand what's going on. You can try to solve problems together. For some possible questions you might want to ask see Why Changes are Happening.
Feeling like we are good at something can give us confidence to get through other challenges in our lives and helps us figure out who we are. Dive deep into hobbies or master a new skill! See Self Care Strategies for tips.
Find out more about what happens during a separation. Knowing about both the legal and emotional parts of separation can help you feel less confused and more empowered. See Get Empowered for more.
Remember that you are not responsible for your parents' decisions! It is not your fault they are separating. Focus on what is within your control rather than what isn't. See What Can We Control.
Negative self talk can be self fulfilling, but so can positive self talk! Saying positive things to yourself can change how you think about things.
- Catch yourself when you are thinking negative things about yourself
- Challenge these bad thoughts
- Replace them with more helpful and reasonable thoughts.
See Managing Unhelpful Thoughts for more.
Doing sports, exercising, and being physically active are great ways to let out your feelings in a positive way. It also just makes you feel good. If you can, spend time outside in nature! Check out our Connecting With Your Community page for more tips on getting involved in active things.
Tell those close to you what you need, what bothers you, and what makes you uncomfortable. Try to avoid situations and people that stress you out. Doing this can help make the people around you treat you better. Look at Caught in the Middle for helpful tips.
Think of three things you are looking forward to. Set goals for today, this week, this month and this year. This can help you get out of dwelling on your situation and give you hope. Look at your weekly schedule and think about what you’d like to achieve this week.
If you start to feel frustrated and angry, take a break to cool down. Find a quiet place, take deep breaths or yell into a pillow, and think about what's making you upset. When you feel calmer, you can talk about your feelings with someone you trust.
Social media can connect us, but it can also make us feel bad about ourselves. It’s easy to compare ourselves to others and feel inadequate. Especially when what people post is idealized and not always true to reality. Try taking a break. Use our journal prompts to help you take some time to reflect.
